Life in the Shadows of Parkinson's Disease - Helen Tan
Zero-bounds Assistant:
A Peek into the Mixed Blessings of Caregiving, asshared by Helen Tan, a wife caring for her husband, Arthur Tan
Helen Tan, a Devoted Caregiver
Helen Tan, born and raised in Malaysia, relocated to Sydney along with her future husband, Arthur Tan, more than four decades ago. Helen was pursuing nursing training while Arthur was an accountant. "We've been married for almost five decades now," Helen reminisces, "and we've raised a wonderful family."
Their daughter is 41, and their son Matt, who is on the autism spectrum, is 39. "Matt needs assistance in managing his daily routines," Helen explains, "but he's quite independent."
As their children ventured into the world, Helen embarked on a new career path, becoming a manager for Australia Post for 25 years, while Arthur remained in accountancy.
Taking the Plunge
Arthur's decline started with seemingly minor issues like trouble tying shoelaces or fastening buckles. "I worked alongside a Parkinson's patient during my nursing days," Helen recalls, "and I noticed Arthur's gait changing. Even a visiting relative hinted at an issue."
His job at a printing business became a struggle as writing cheques became difficult. In time, Arthur had to resign.
The family's dynamic shifted, with Helen quitting her job at Australia Post to open a café to provide Matt valuable work experience. Arthur's condition continued to deteriorate, but he was adamant against medical intervention.
The Pivotal Turn
Helen's café consumed her time, and Arthur's health declined further. With assistance, he could no longer get up from his chair. Realizing the situation was untenable, Helen encouraged him to seek medical help.
The initial GP referred them to a neurologist who was 99% certain of the diagnosis: Parkinson's Disease. Arthur refused treatment. Helen sought out the Parkinson's NSW InfoLine, which she found to be instrumental in changing their lives.
Navigating the Journey
After divesting her time from the café, Helen managed to convince Arthur to accept treatment. They found a compassionate neurologist who explained the disease and its management effectively.
Despite focusing on her husband's health, Helen neglected her own, nearly suffering a major heart attack.
Arthur's condition was stabilized through a combination of therapy, medication, and various activities such as Dance for Parkinson's, PD Warrior, Tai Chi, hydrotherapy, speech therapy, and more. They became active participants in fundraising events and support groups, finding solace and camaraderie in shared experiences.
Adapting to Change
As the disease progressed, it became increasingly difficult for Helen to care for Arthur at home. Their son Matt, who was unable to attend his day program due to the pandemic, stepped up to assist with tasks like bathing his father.
However, this change in dynamics proved challenging for the entire family. Arthur was eventually admitted to a nursing home to ensure his safety and provide round-the-clock care.
Reclaiming Balance
Arthur now enjoys life at the nursing home, joining activities through virtual platforms like Zoom. The family visits once a week for a meal. Helen can finally focus on supporting Matt's independence and maintaining her own health.
A devout Christian, Helen feels blessed by the experiences and the lessons she has learned throughout this journey.
"I've learned that it's crucial to care for myself if I want to continue caring for others," she reflects. "It's okay to ask for help and accept help. And it's important to connect with others who share similar experiences."
- Helen Tan's new career path after her children ventured into the world was in the field of health and wellness, becoming a manager for Australia Post.
- Helen and her husband, Arthur Tan, had to deal with Arthur's chronic disease, Parkinson's Disease, which affected not only their family health but also their mental health.
- During their journey, Helen discovered the importance of seeking resources and assistance, such as the Parkinson's NSW InfoLine, which provided crucial support for both patient and caregiver.
- Helen's experiences taught her the importance of self-care in her role as a caregiver, emphasizing the need to maintain her own mental, emotional, and physical health for continued caregiving.
