Navigating Life After Loss: Strategies for Daughters to Handle the Bereavement of a Mother
Losing a mother is an incredibly challenging experience, one that can lead to a myriad of emotions and physical health issues. According to a study, grief is linked to increased chances of cancer, cardiac issues, immune disorders, and high blood pressure.
However, it's important to remember that honoring a mother's memory can take many forms. You might choose to donate to her favourite charity, achieve a personal goal she wanted, or even write about your experiences, as authors like Caroline Wahl, Kirsty Capes, Ralf Schlatter, and Ann Napolitano have done.
Wahl's book, "Windstärke 17," narrates the story of Ida after her mother's overdose death, while Capes' novel focuses on two sisters coping with the death of their famous, extravagant mother. Schlatter explores family dynamics and approaches the mother's death with honesty and subtle humor, and Napolitano touches on close family bonds and loss, though more focused on family in general rather than solely on the mother.
In addition to literature, there are numerous books available to help during the grieving process. "Healing After the Loss of Your Mother: A Grief & Comfort Manual", "Motherless Daughters: The Legacy of Loss", and "How to Survive the Loss of a Parent: A Guide for Adults" are just a few examples.
It's not uncommon to experience regret for lost family traditions and cultural knowledge after losing your mother. However, keeping up with traditions from your mother or starting your own traditions may help ease the burden of loss.
Maternal support can come from various figures, not just a blood relative. Offering support to others who have experienced parental loss can be a meaningful way to cope with grief.
Grief that impairs your daily functioning, or persists for longer than a year, may require the support of a mental health professional. The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (5th ed.) lists a variety of normal emotions in the year following parental loss, including regret, remorse, anxiety, guilt, emptiness, rage, anger, sadness, and numbness.
Mindfulness, the ability to focus on the moment, can help manage painful memories related to the loss of a mother. Local support groups, online chat forums, and mental health professionals can provide assistance during the grieving process.
The effects of grief after the loss of a mother are different for everyone. It's crucial to remember that you are not alone in your grief, and support is available right now. The 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline, Crisis Text Line, and Befrienders Worldwide offer immediate help for those experiencing overwhelming grief or considering self-harm or suicide.
A 2015 study found that women have a more intense grief response and more difficulty adjusting to the loss of a parent compared to men. Women who experience the loss of a mother are more likely than men to binge drink, have a greater decline in self-esteem, and have a lower level of personal mastery (personal growth).
It's essential to remember that while the death of a mother can mean losing an important part of your support system, you can find strength in the memories you shared and the love she gave you. Focusing on happy reminders such as pictures, books, or keepsakes can provide comfort during the grieving process.
In conclusion, the loss of a mother is a complex and profound event, but there are resources available to help you navigate this challenging time. Whether it's through literature, support groups, or mental health professionals, remember that you are not alone, and there is help available when you need it.
